Bereavement Professional

  • 1.  Information for a Grief Group

    Posted 01-17-2023 01:12 PM
    Hello! 

    I am a Bereavement Coordinator with our Hospice, and I was asked by a group home in town to do a grief support for some of the workers. They recently lost one of their developmentally challenged adults. Their supervisor called me and stated that they were having troubles handling this recent loss. With the support groups that I do in our Hospice Group, I just do it as an informal group. I let them talk and we discuss with each other what they're going through. I guess the reason for this whole post is asking if any of you have done something like this, and if you have any information that you could share for me to give to them. I have some information, but I wanted to make sure I took as much as I could with me to help them. 

    Thanks!


  • 2.  RE: Information for a Grief Group

    Posted 01-17-2023 03:14 PM
    We use Dr Alan Wolfelt's book The Understanding Your Grief Support Group Guide and the Understanding your grief book.  We read a chapter at home, discuss, share stories, and offer support during our 6 week groups.  Look him up on youtube.com, he is a great resource.  We've used many of his books.

    Original Message


  • 3.  RE: Information for a Grief Group

    Posted 01-18-2023 09:22 AM

    I am also a big supporter of Dr. Alan Wolfelt's material. I use the Understanding your grief Support Group Guide for my support groups. I like to start with a check in and have group members "start where they are at" and then with the time remaining we review one of the touchstones. For this staff you could use a similar strategy to "check in" with the group to see where they are at and work through specific questions or concerns. Since the first group with a staff group that you are not familiar with may not be as productive as a long-standing bereavement group you will likely be focusing on identifying the loss and letting them know it is ok to be emotional and support one another as they heal from this experience. As an example, Touchstone #1 says, " Someone you love has died. In your heart you have come to know your deepest pain. In opening to the presence of the pain of your loss, in acknowledging the inevitability of the pain, in being willing to gently embrace the pain, you in effect honor the pain. Crazy as it may sound, your pain is the key that opens your heart and ushers you on your way to healing. "  I like to focus on the healing nature of the grief work ahead. That may not be a bad place to start. My thoughts anyway. Best of luck with this precious group.

     

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    Corrie VanDyke, LMSW

    Bereavement Coordinator

    Volunteer Coodinator

    10 Buckingham Plantation Drive

    Suite A

    Bluffton, SC 29910

    O: 843.757.9388

    F: 843.757.9385

     

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  • 4.  RE: Information for a Grief Group

    Posted 01-18-2023 09:30 AM
    I appreciate this response!! All of you. Thank you for getting me starting in a better direction! I had some information ready, but I wanted to be as prepared as I could be for them. It's hard losing someone in general but losing someone where you work in this capacity is hard. The death was sudden, so it has hit them a little harder than they were anticipating it to
    Original Message


  • 5.  RE: Information for a Grief Group

    Posted 01-18-2023 09:18 AM
    I had this same situation at a group home and we set up a time that all staff could meet and share their memories of the resident.  Because the staff worked different shifts, they all shared different stories that the other's hadn't heard.  They found themselves smiling while remembering.  The fact that the administrator gave the staff the opportunity and time to grieve was a big help for the staff.   I added the group home to our monthly mailings and called them on occasion to follow up.  The group home now knows they can come to us for grief supports when needed.
    Original Message


  • 6.  RE: Information for a Grief Group

    Posted 01-18-2023 09:47 AM
    I like the idea of letting them just talk, with a little bit of facilitation.  Then you could explore whether they desire an ongoing group and something more structured like Wolfelt's Understanding Your Grief.  I know you mentioned that this is for the workers.  I wonder about the other group home residents also.  Rituals are a very good way to help folks with or without developmental disabilities honor and process a loss.  This might be an option for intervention.  The book Helping People with Disabilities Mourn is very good.  Author is Marc Markell (with a foreword by Alan Wolfelt).
    Original Message


  • 7.  RE: Information for a Grief Group

    Posted 01-18-2023 10:41 AM
    I have done very similar things for group home staff (and sometimes residents too) as Barb and Leigh Ann mention. It seems that the relationships that develop in a group home are often very much like family ... so very close ... and so storytelling and ritual have been helpful tools for me to facilitate their support. 

    Thanks for the book reference, Leigh Ann, to help those with disabilities to mourn.  What a great resource to have!

    Alan Wolfelt's resources are so helpful ... I've used the Understanding Your Grief book in a group of folks who are still struggling deeply with their grief beyond a year.

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    Nancy Arnold CDP
    Bereavement Manager
    Supportive Care Services
    Visiting Nurse Association
    Southcoast Health | 200 Mill Road | Fairhaven, MA. 02719
    508-973-3227 / cell: 774-319-3007
    ArnoldN@southcoast.org
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    Original Message


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